I slept with a friend who has a boyfriend
Gentlemen, don’t kiss and tell. I’m not one.
It was somewhat easy. He was far. I was near. I was nice. I wasn’t pushy. And I offered no emotional commitments. I am like the drink you get yourself intoxicated with to get over something but without the (emotional) hangover.
I think I like her. A lot. It’s annoying. I can’t have her because I swore off commited relationships for now. Besides, it would be tough to trust her after that episode. She cheated and that is, in essense, a bad start for something where trust is the basis for staying together. Tough luck. The funny thing is, we never would even be in such a situation if she didn’t have a boyfriend. We would probably just continued on our platonic way.
I’m really not looking for a commitment right now. But I sometimes catch myself wishing for it. Even if for just a few short seconds.
I narrowed it down to a few things:
- We had good fun with each other. It is easy to relate with her. No expectations set. It’s easier to be ourselves and find amazing things about each other.
- Our first kiss was amazing. It was the best one I had this month. I kissed a number of girls this month. And that kiss with her was really good. I want to kiss her again soon.
- Sleeping beside her was amazing. It reminded me of sleeping beside my ex. It was comforting. Though I can’t say it will never happen again or it is something immensely special to me, I had the same moment with some other girl. I am just surprised to feel that way with her. I never planned to feel that way. I couldn’t sleep because it felt so good to be lying there beside her. For once, I wasn’t restless beside someone. It made me think, “Maybe it wasn’t so bad to have a girlfriend if only for the reason of sleeping beside someone you are comfortable with and you like.”
I want to see her again. I do.
and I will have to meet another new person.
She’s got a boyfriend.
- t.h.
